It’s not uncommon for foster and kinship carers to experience times of fatigue. When caring for your family and the children in your care, you can sometimes forget to prioritise your own self-care and wellbeing. However, it’s so important that you take time to practice self-care. This allows you to recharge and refocus so that you can be at your best for the young people you care for.
Children need your full attention. They need you to listen to them and have the energy to take on life’s joys and challenges. When you don’t take breaks, you might start to experience increased levels of stress, poor judgement, sleep issues and feelings of being out of control.
Why is self-care important?
Self-care is a necessity. Without it, carers may risk jeopardising their physical and emotional health. By investing in your own physical, spiritual and emotional needs, you’re helping yourself to:
- Prevent burnout – which is a state of exhaustion caused by prolonged stress or strain;
- Improve emotional resilience – which is an ability to bounce back and adapt to times of stress and cope with life’s ups and downs;
- Improve your caring capacity – so that you can show up for young people when they need you the most; and
- Model healthy behaviours for young people – so they know it’s normal and okay to prioritise their own self-care in their own times of need.
Self-care strategies
There are many ways that you can nourish yourself and meet your needs as a foster or kinship carer. Here’s how.
Make sleep part of your self-care routine
Sleep and the quality of sleep can have a huge impact on your emotional and physical wellbeing.
So, what can you do to make sleep a priority in your self-care routine?
Well, you can start by thinking about what your current night-time routine looks like. Do you eat or drink immediately before going to bed? If so, it’s important to avoid caffeine and sugar, as they can keep you awake.
Reducing stress is also key. If you have work-related stress, think about the best ways to calm yourself after a hard day or relax more while on the job. Maybe take a shower or use essential oils such as lavender on your pulse points before bedtime.
Next, free your bedroom of distractions such as a television and mobile phones to make sure you are in the best possible place for you to get good REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep.
Read more about how you can improve your quality of sleep in an earlier blog, here.
Nourishing your body and gut
Are you eating enough of the right foods for your body?
Eating the right foods can help prevent inflammation in the body and can reduce the risk of diseases. By eating more self-care foods such as fatty fish, nuts, blueberries, green leafy vegetables and other vegetables, you’ll be on your way to better health.
What you eat also affects the bacteria that live in your gut. Following a balanced diet, staying hydrated, exercising regularly and getting a good night’s sleep all influence a healthy gut; increasing your energy levels and emotional wellbeing. Read more here.
Get enough exercise
Exercise can have many benefits for your body and mind. It increases cardiovascular activity and releases endorphins in your brain, increasing your happiness and helping to reduce stress.
Exercise reduces frustrations and clears your mind of worries. In fact, research has shown that even minimal exercise is better than doing nothing. So, walking in the morning, doing stretches before bedtime, dancing in the kitchen or doing whatever it takes to add some exercise into your day is all part of looking after you and practicing self-care.
When it comes to exercising, try to do exercises that you enjoy.
Practicing self-care means learning to say “no”
Nobody likes to say “no” and disappoint others. We feel obligated to say “yes” when someone wants our attention, our time or energy. However, when we’re stressed or low on energy, we need to recognise that if we don’t stop and take some time out, we could end up making poor choices or burning out. It may seem hard at first, but saying “no” can be empowering and it also frees up some more time for yourself.
Children learn from what they see. If they see you’re frazzled, low on energy and putting yourself last, then they are going to think that self-care isn’t important.
Get organised
It’s important to develop plans for you and your family to keep you organised. Whether it be meal prepping and organising your weekly commitments. When organising yourself, it’s important to schedule time for yourself so that you can also prioritise that special time for you.
Keep your planner in your living space, somewhere like the kitchen so that everyone can see what’s on for the week and know what they need to do.
Do things you love
Whatever you decide to do, make sure your ‘me time’ is regular. Tapping into your support network, such as other family members, parents, or friends to help watch the kids for a little while can also be important to help enable time for yourself. ‘Me time’ can occur when your young people are at school, appointments or when they’ve gone to bed for the day.
If you don’t do things to fill yourself up spiritually, emotionally and physically – you will end up feeling drained. The world needs the happy, fulfilled, best version of you – this way everyone benefits.
Your happiness is important. Those in your care are important. The more you can practice taking time for you, the greater your love of life and appreciation of your family and friends. Self-care can be done in many different ways. Start with little steps, do the things you love and take the time to invest in you.
Even if you aren’t able to do things you love, all the time, take some time to do something relaxing. Whether that’s:
- taking a relaxing bath
- reading a book
- going for a walk/ run
- enjoying a cup of tea
- watching a movie or television show.
Connect with your support team
Foster and kinship carers will receive guidance and support from their carer agency. Support is comprised of the broader agency, your practitioner and can also include a network of other carers. These people will be available to answer any questions or concerns you might have. They might also be a good resource to tap into when you’re experiencing times of stress or burnout.
Utilise respite care
If you’re a primary foster carer, you have a right to access respite care support. Respite care is a tool that allows you to take a well-earned break from your foster or kinship caring duties. Whether it’s for a weekend, a few days or a few weeks, respite care will allow children and young people to be cared for by respite carers while you take some time out for you and your family. Learn more about respite care, here.
More self-care strategies
Some other strategies that you can do to enhance your self-care, as a foster or kinship carer, include:
- taking some time every day (even if it’s 15-30 minutes) to do something just for you
- self-reflection and self-compassion
- stay informed and up-to-date with changes or strategic tools that can enhance your caring experience
- access professional support and counselling
- celebrate your achievements.
Stay up-to-date
As mentioned, staying up-to-date as a carer is an important self-care strategy. For all the latest news and information about foster and kinship caring, please visit our Foster and Kinship Care webpage or call our team on 1300 000 828.